wade in america

hi hows life?

cool, my life is mellow

i have been surfing 

more than i should

i guess you'd call it

therapeutic steps to levitation

the new board is a keeper

the one below is molting

the photo below that?

:)

promises kept

i will never go where you think i should
nor will i yield how i feel importance
what i value, and who lives in their place
laughter can succeed even the most rigid arms

joy can assimilate past introduction
and breed the wave of life.

tepid water

im bound by earthly desires, and the struggle to be happy each morning
first thought not, second thought, how?
so much day to account for,
all while trying to stay away from boredom


hours to fill, and a place to be stuck filling them,
typical battles, from typical sources,
waving their flags as an invite to collusion
great, now that we have you here,
lets get started.

we have issues with how you have been raised
we have reservations about seeing your face
our committee has decided to cut your funding
we found someone else,
upon which to lavish our horrid gaze.

a fine job you have done, but fine like a point
secluded to one ink stain,
yet the assignment was to paint the world.

maybe another lifetime,
maybe another soft line,
possibly never again.
say the sacrificial

home baked happiness

things feel different lately
i dont feel so untangled by life
i have a source of patience
one that carries me past conflict

i dont feel so hurt,
and i dont pick up my shame
it just sits there,
where it belongs,
in it's place on the floor

needless to say, this is not over
i don't have 'this" thing sorted
or even counted

all i can say is it is visible,
to a once blind cat.

love you all,
to the readers,
and the unknown

thoughts on birds

Any day now I will hear you say "Goodbye, my love"
And you'll be on your way
Then my wild beautiful bird, you will have flown, oh
Any day now I'll be all alone, whoa

Any day now, when your restless eyes meet someone new
Oh, to my sad surprise
Then the blue shadows will fall all over town, oh
Any day now love will let me down, whoa

Oh my wild beautiful bird, you will have flown, oh
Any day now I'll be all alone

I know I shouldn't want to keep you
If you don't want to stay-ay
Until you go forever
I'll be holding on for dear life
Holding you this way
Begging you to stay

Any day now when the clock strikes, 'Go'
You'll call it off
And then my tears will flow
Then the blue shadows will fall all over town, oh
Any day now love will let me down 'cause you won't be around

Don't fly away, my beautiful bird
Don't, don't fly away.

i died

i killed myself, and im speaking from my ashes.
i ate 4 grams of wonderful mushrooms and absolutely killed myself

i left this world, and blacked out into other dimensions
psychotic breaks and past lives
floating in the fabric of time, oozing more like it
honestly not sure if i would return

but im here.
and i know what the crazy people screaming at thin air
are seeing
i let go of certain people
constructed myself as i truly am
i would recommend you do the same

we should all kill ourselves before we die.

you are more than human, find out.

the day after, a dollar before

the winds are at it again,
stirring me from sleep
buzzing in my ear
like mosquitos in the night.
fuck it, give me your hand
but only if it's full of pills.

i cant admit that i want to be in the light
i can only tell you
im calcified on the inside
stones for legs, and shells for eyes
trying to avoid the buying and selling
of our collective cultural soul

do it,
sell it, buy it
at least  ill be fucking myself
and keeping my sweaty hands
in their bottomless pockets

cool killed itself
and all i want
is to be known as cool

i see the ledge,
i climbed the stairs
i saw the beautiful person
falling through air

screaming and yelling
can you see me now?
landing with a thud
and imprinting a smile

read this and weep,
the tree cut down
to plant a forest
in place of fallen ideals

im almost free
to show you how it feels
what ive conjured up
as being me